The Great Biography Project: Airns

 Well hello there night-dwellers. Unless you’re reading this in the daytime. Well this is just awkward, now isn’t it?


 Starting over. 


 Okay, so we all know why we’re here. So I can exhume overly thought-out ideas of things that nobody has ever heard of before. As a writer, it is my solemn duty to inflict such word-based homicide on y’all. 


 SO let’s get to it. As I mentioned in my last post, I’m going to work from the bottom up when it comes to lore. So, starting this series… thing off right is a very detailed, very long description of the Airns. They are the main and only species in my enormous book series thingy. I’m sure I mentioned it before, Fancy Lads the series is called right now, with Promenade being its first entry. But anyway, yes, it takes place on the planet Arn with the Airns as the prime and only sentient species living on here. So, here we go:


Airns: Bipedal natives to the planet Arn, their name meaning literally “Arn-born,” Airns are roughly human in shape with two legs, arms, one head, two eyes, ears, one nose, and one mouth. That is about where the similarities end, however. Airns are descendants of various animal species across Arn. The biodiversity, hostile predators, extremely variable geography, and far greater amount of solar radiation has led to a totally different primordial soul than Earth. Wolves, foxes, felines, ravens, and the like eventually evolved into the Airns of today. Evolution favoured the smaller, wilier creatures to avoid the enormous predators of Arn (I’m still working on specific species names, but think if woolly mammoths and dire wolves still roamed around) whereas the largest species including bears, lions, and even dragons lost ground against those smaller, more intelligent species.

            In the modern day, however, the Airns have almost entirely left their animalistic genes behind. They have no fur any long, except for those of advanced age who grow tufts of fur on the backs of their heads or on their faces. Because of Arn’s colder climate, there is also a very thin layer of fur, scales, or feathers depending on the species that grows on the skin, much like arm hair on humans. Airns have lost their tails long ago, but very, very rarely a tail will grow on a child a few years after birth. It’s a vestigial body part, however, so it cannot move on its own power and has very little fur or hair. In terms of their skin colour, their pigmentation is never in the extremes of our species in lightness or darkness.

            Airns do retain their animal genes in other ways, though. Their teeth, canines in particular, are longer, sharper, and more fearsome and they sport longer tongues. Also, they lack most of the whites in their eyes that we humans have, their eyes looking more like the species they descended from. Airns only have four fingers, including their thumbs, and their fingers are a tiny bit shorter, albeit thicker than ours and have animalistic claws on the end of them which double as nails. Their feet only have three toes as well. In truth, they are six toes, but pairs of two meld together in less than a year after birth and then transform into something almost hoof-like.

            Other small cosmetic changes include ears that are pointed, but the points flop down, like a dog’s ears. This changes from species to species, generally, however. Airns as a whole are taller, heavier, and denser than us humans, thanks to their biology and heavier (in terms of gravity) and more dangerous environment. Whiskers reminiscent of cats or Eastern Dragons can eventually grow on older Airns as well. In general, their faces and bone structure is more sharply defined than ours, which is due to their more defined internal construction.

            Speaking of which, on to biology:

            Because of the more trying environment of Arn, the Airns have been endowed with various improvements within their bodies to stay alive. Firstly, they are well and immune to forces of radiation and their bodies are impervious to airborn toxins or diseases. Arn, in the far past, had produces diseases of incredible strength from fungi and flora that used to span the entire world until evolution rendered all fauna immune.

            To deal with predators (and in the past, other species of Airns), Airns possess stronger skeletons and tighter, strong muscles than us humans and are also endowed with horns. But those horns aren’t so useful or intended as one might think. In fact, their creation was a complete mistake.

            Nature has saw fit to keep the Airns from rising too high with a terrible curse- a disease that lives within every Airn without exception. It lives within the bone marrow that allowed the Airn skeleton to grow in such strange. Omniossification is it’s name and while most Airns will never have the disease fully “awaken,” until recently, it was virtually a guarantee for an afflicted person to die from the disease. The affliction causes bone growth to accelerate out of control, eventually skewering the victim from the inside.

            An Airn’s horns not only reflect their species, but their own luck with the disease. The Airns almost did not survive as a species because of Omniossification– at one point, the disease almost managed to grow from the skull directly into the brain. Instead, however, the Airns were lucky. Instead, around the age of five or six, Airn children begin to grow horns which are, in fact, benign offshoots of Omniossification.

            Furthermore and finally, because of the extremely complicated nature of Airn physiology and the presence of Omniossification not making things any better, Airns can have very few children. Larger creatures such as Dragons or Lions can have very few children, three or less, before the mother’s body can no longer sustain giving birth. To further complicate things, Airns can only breed with their own species. Canine species can only breed with canines, etc.

            An extremely rare occurrence, however, is a half-breed or “Greywalker” (called such because they “walk the grey zone” between two species). Half-breeds have their horns usually grow erratically, sometimes hardly growing horns at all and other times giving rise to virtual racks of antlers. Greywalkers absolutely cannot procreate and have been looked down by most of society with pity rather than anger because of their impotence and usually very shortened lifespans. 



 HEY, so if you stuck around to read that entire Ulysses-length word-vomit than congratulations! You win a nothing! And my undying gratitude and a gold star for your efforts if I had gold stars to give out. Which I do not. Oh well, you win some you lose some. Anyway, I shall see you all next time on the Great Biography Project (which has yet to include a real biography yet but hey who’s even counting?)





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