Friday Fictioneers: Kleptomaniacal

Greeting and salutations, homo sapien creatures of various varieties of gender denomination, ethnic nationalities, and sexual orientations. I do perceive that you are now reading and comprehending this introduction through the cluster of optic nerves location roughly 66.66% up the vertical alignment lines of your face. This pleases me greatly by elevating the amount of dopamine and other pleasure-based brain chemicals, for now in this current state of time, I shall be presenting for your reading and reflecting pleasure, a short and lighthearted narrative for the collaboration of writers which gathers on a weekly basis which goes by the name of Friday Ficitoneers. The title of this lighthearted tale is entitled “Kleptomaniacal” and the title provided for this tale should be self-sufficient in assisting your ascertaining of the general theme(s) of the story.

I encourage all of you currently reading this post on the website known as WordPress to enjoy the narrative I have constructed and included in the area, relatively speaking in the dimensions of two-dimensional cyberspace, below~

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Words Count: 100

“Books?” Izzy scoffed. “You brought us all the way out here for books? Oh, sorry, books and letters.”
“Be quiet,” I said. I started feverishly searching through the drawers- just more dust. “The key needs to be around here somewhere.”

“What’s in the stupid safe anyway?” Izzy asked as she plopped into the old chair.

I shrugged. “Maybe nothing. But it’s a locked safe ripe for the taking in an abandoned house. That’s good enough.”

I kept looking in the drawers and flipped down the picture of the long-dead house’s owner. I thought he might see me through the glass.

Photo copyright: Jan Wayne Fields

Photo copyright: Jan Wayne Fields

I think I gave myself a headache writing that opening. In fact, I probably put more effort into that than the actual story. Oh well, I like using these Friday Fictioneer pieces as a way to just push out ideas and not care too much about the quality. Like a warm-up exercise. And also an exercise in brevity. AND an exercise in spelling the word exercise because as of me writing this I haven’t yet spelled that gosh-dang word correctly even once! URG.

Good luck, you brave writer folk!



6 comments on “Friday Fictioneers: Kleptomaniacal

  1. Dear Michael,

    Your narrator is the cockeyed optimist I think. Also should the last line be “I thought” rather than “It thought?” Hope he finds the key.



  2. Really nice writing; the kind of writing that makes me forget I’m reading, which is what it’s all about. This does, though, feel like a tiny slice of something longer rather than a piece that stands alone (but that isn’t a complaint).

    When I moved into my house, I discovered a tiny safe built into a wall in the cellar. It was locked and there was no key. And it was a probate sale, so the previous was dead. After a few weeks called in a locksmith who drilled out the lock. And… there was nothing inside 😦


    • Agh, that’s disappointing. How discourteous to leave an empty safe lying around, ripe to build up false hope. Either way, I’m glad you enjoyed. And yes, most of my Friday Fictioneer entries feel like smaller parts of a bigger narrative. Big narratives are kind of my thing, so the connection is understandable.

  3. That last action makes me think this may not be on the up-and-up.

  4. Your title makes it seem as though he is a bit of a thief but is it thievery of the house is abandoned? Isn’t that under “lost and found”?

  5. Michael, I thought for sure that key would be fastened behind that picture. I can well imagine how that beginning gave you a headache. It almost gave me one reading it. 😀 Well written. 🙂 —Susan

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