Five Sentence Fiction: Midwestern Blurt




So, today I had a meeting as part of a class and then at a reading later on in the day, with the fantastic author Carole Maso. Most would probably know her as the author of the avant-garde experimental novel, Ava. She was a great pleasure to listen to and has convinced me yet again that all of us fiction writers are completely out of our gourds. We can, in fact, reasonably pass off laying on the ground listening to music as “work.” Because, it obviously is. AND. When during a brief conversation when she was signing my copy of Ava, I came up with the term, “Midwestern Blurt” as a way to explain how us from the Midwest like to speak very plainly but also waste about 1-2 sentenceworths of time just trying to tell people we want to have a conversation.

She seemed to agree!


Have fun~




Word of Inspiration: Open

Word Count: 143

Genre: Creative Nonfiction (I suppose)

Title: Midwestern Blurt



I decided to call the phenomenon the “Midwest Blurt.” It is so-called due to the tendency for us Midwesterners to, when we about to begin a conversation, say one or two sentences before the conversation truly begins that mean absolutely nothing at all. I have likened the habit to a kind of warning alarm, one that warns the other speaker of an impending conversation. This “Blurt” usually occurs directly after the, “Hello-how-are-you” small-talk introductions that imply that we wish to speak. But to have a conversation, however, requires most Midwesterners to be very frank and very open, saying the first things to come into their minds well before they realize that they wasted everybody’s time by doing so. And now that I have your attention and am about to embark on this conversation with you… I believe I have run out of spac-






You all should  go read Ava! It’s really neat. And makes me feel mildly bad about being a novelist that emphasizes narrative and linearity rather than… well, just read Ava! And Bay of Angels when it eventually comes out! And then read Malone Dies. And Unbearable Lightness of Being. And If On a Winter’s Night a Traveler… they’re all great books!

And weird ones!


That’s it, I got nothing else. GOODBYE.



Good luck, you brave writer folk!





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